Am I in an Abusive Relationship?

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  • Warning Signs of Abusive Relationships
  • USF Resources
  • Additional Resources 

Warning Signs of Abusive Relationships

Does your partner …

  • Call you names, insult you, humiliate you, or continually criticize you?
  • Act jealous, possessive, or as if you can’t be trusted although you have not cheated?
  • Try to isolate you from family or friends?
  • Monitor where you go and who you contact or spend time with?
  • Forbid you from working or going to school?
  • Make all of the decisions and/or expect you to ask permission for everything?
  • Punish you by withholding affection?
  • Threaten to hurt you, your children, your family, or your pets?
  • Destroy things or threaten to do so to punish or intimidate you?
  • Play mind games that make you doubt yourself or feel "crazy?"
  • Blame you for their bad behavior or make excuses for their behavior?
  • Tell you that your emotions and needs are invalid or unimportant?
  • Shove, hit, kick, strangle, or otherwise physically hurt you?
  • Force, pressure, guilt, or coerce you into performing sexual acts when you don't want to? 
  • Threaten to hurt or kill themselves in order to control you?
  • Tell you that no one besides them will ever love you?

If any of these are patterns in your relationship, it's likely an abusive situation. This is common; you are not alone. See below for helpful resources.

If you are currently in imminent danger, please call USF Public Safety (if on campus) at (415) 422-2911 or call 911.

     

    USF Resources

    For Students

    • CAPS: Brief therapy and other support and education; (415) 422-6352
    • Title IX Office: Information, resources, and support around sexual assault, harassment, relationship violence, and stalking; (415) 422-4563
    • University Ministry: Religious and spiritual support and counsel; (415) 422-4463

    For Staff and Faculty

    Additional Resources

    Hotlines

    Urgent Medical Care

    If you need immediate medical attention related to a sexual assault and may wish to preserve evidence for future legal purposes and get connected to other support services, visit the Zuckerberg San Francisco General Emergency Department, 1001 Potrero Avenue, San Francisco. Medical services for clients who have been sexually assaulted are provided by a nurse practitioner or physician assistant forensic specialist from the Trauma Recovery Center/Rape Treatment Center TRC/RTC. Follow-up care for acute medical issues related to sexual trauma (within 5 days of assault) and other medical and mental health services are provided through the TRC/RTC, San Francisco General Hospital, 2727 Mariposa St., #100, San Francisco, CA 94110; (415) 437-3000; traumarecoverycenter.org/(link is external).

    Off-Campus Counseling & Other Services

    • Bay Area Women Against Rape (BAWAR)(link is external): Provides counseling, advocacy, and education to survivors of sexual assault of ALL genders; 470 27th Street, Oakland; (510) 845-7273 (24-hour crisis line); (510) 430-1298 (office); Monday–Friday 9 a.m.–5 p.m.
    • Community Overcoming Relationship Abuse (CORA)(link is external): Information, support, and other resources for victims of intimate partner abuse; languages spoken: English and Spanish; (800) 300-1080 or (650) 312-8515 (crisis); (650) 259-1855 (legal services line for victims only); (650) 652-0800 (office); 2211 Palm Avenue, San Mateo
    • Community United Against Violence (CUAV)(link is external): Empowers LGBTQIA communities to transform violence and oppression; peer counseling and support groups for LGBTQIA people dealing with violence or abuse; 427 South Van Ness Avenue, San Francisco; leave a message at the Safety Line at (415) 333-4357; (415) 777-5500 (office)
    • La Casa de las Madres(link is external): (415) 255-0165 (business line); 1269 Howard Street, San Francisco; support and various services and resources for victims of domestic violence; emergency shelter (see "Hotlines" section for 24-hour hotline info)
    • Narika(link is external)Promotes women's independence, economic empowerment and well-being by helping survivors of intimate partner abuse and violence with advocacy, support, and education. Languages: South Asian languages; (800) 215-7308 (help-line message machine will return calls in 24 hours); (510) 444-6068 (office); Fremont
    • Riley Center(link is external), St. Vincent De Paul Society: (415) 757-6595 (English), (415) 757-6490 (Spanish), 1175 Howard Street, San Francisco; services for those experiencing domestic violence, including emergency shelter, counseling, workshops, and advocacy
    • San Francisco Women Against Rape(link is external): (415) 647-7273 (24-hour hotline); provides peer counseling, support groups, advocacy, and education
    • Shalom Bayit(link is external): Fosters the social change and community response necessary to eradicate domestic violence in the Jewish community; information, counseling, and other resources for battered Jewish women; education and prevention; (866) SHALOM-7 (toll-free help line); (510) 451-8874 (office)
    • STAND! For Families Free of Violence(link is external): Provides a spectrum of prevention, intervention, and treatment programs and enlists the efforts of local residents, partners, and institutions to stop domestic violence and child abuse; (925) 676-2845 (office); (888) 215-5555 (crisis line); locations in Antioch, Concord, and Richmond
    • Trauma Recovery Center/Rape Treatment Center (TRC/RTC)(link is external): 2727 Mariposa St., #100, San Francisco; (415) 437-3000; affiliated with San Francisco General Hospital; provides medical and mental health services for adult victims of sexual assault and services for adult survivors of trauma, assault, and loss
    • Women Organized to Make Abuse Nonexistent (W.O.M.A.N.), Inc.(link is external) - (877) 384-3578 (24-hour hotline); also provides information, education, support groups, and therapy to battered women in San Francisco and the greater Bay Area; offers a Latinx program in Spanish

    Harassment, Digital Abuse, & Stalking RESOURCES

    Law Enforcement

    • San Francisco Police Department(link is external): Get assistance when your safety and well being are at risk and to report abuse or assault. Note: When calling 911 on a cellular phone near a highway, the call is connected to the California Highway Patrol (CHP) dispatch center; in other areas in San Francisco, the call will connect directly to SF Police dispatch. You can dial directly to SF dispatch at (415) 553-8090; emergency: 911; non-emergency: (415) 553-0123. You can also contact the Domestic Violence/Elder Abuse Response Unit(link is external) at (415) 553-922-5850, Bryant Street, Room 454 San Francisco; sfpddvru@yahoo.com 

    Legal Help, Advocacy, & Policy

    Support for Male Survivors

    • Male Survivor(link is external): Organization that provides personalized support for men at every stage of the healing process from domestic violence; information, resources, and online support

    Emergency Shelters

    • Asian Women's Shelter(link is external): Shelter for Asian women, children, and transgender survivors of domestic violence and human trafficking, especially those who are immigrants and refugees. Languages: multiple Asian languages spoken; (415) 751-0880 (crisis); (877) 751-0880 (crisis); (415) 751-7110 (office); 3543 18th Street, #19, San Francisco
    • La Casa de las Madres(link is external): (877) 503-1850 (24-hour crisis line), 1269 Howard Street, San Francisco; support for victims of domestic violence; shelter
    • Riley's Center(link is external): (415) 977-1270, 1175 Howard Street, San Francisco; services for victims of domestic violence, including shelters, counseling, workshops, and advocacy
    • A Safe Place(link is external): Emergency shelter services, counseling, teen dating violence prevention, and other resources and services; (510) 536-7233 (crisis); (510) 986-8600 (office); Oakland

    Miscellaneous